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BREAKING: China Brings Back “Invasive Anal Swab” COVID Test


Well, this is definitely a headline I never thought I would write: Red China has just reinstated the “anal swab” COVID test.

And you thought the nose swab was bad…get ready to bend over and pucker up for invasion!

Here’s the latest:

Trending: Compromised Pedo?

Isn’t this a lovely image?

I believe this is the official face you make during the test:

The NY Post had more details on the invasive anal swab test:

China has brought back its “undignified” anal Covid swabs just two weeks before the Beijing Winter Olympics begin.

The Communist regime claims the virus test — which involves inserting a 5cm long saline-soaked swab up a patient’s bum and rotating it — is more accurate than other on-the-spot virus tests.

Chinese newspaper The Beijing News said at least 27 people underwent the anal swab tests at an apartment building in Beijing where a 26-year-old woman had caught Omicron — the city’s first recorded case of the variant.

The invasive anal tests involve inserting a sterile cotton swab into the rectum and rotating it several times.

The swab is removed and analyzed in a lab.

When the tests were proposed in March, Li Tongzeng, a respiratory disease medic, told state media that COVID traces stay detectable for longer in poo samples than they do in the nose or throat.

However, the prospect of foreign visitors being swabbed up the bum has sparked controversy.

Japan is calling on China to stop using the “undignified” test as some passengers said it caused them “psychological distress”.

China allegedly ordered American diplomats to undergo anal tests sparking a row with the State Department.

Beijing has denied the claims but Washington has slammed the tests as “undignified.”

In response, Lu Hongzhou, a Chinese doctor, told state media that travelers could provide a poo sample at the airport instead.

Louis Slungpoo could not be reached for comment:

According to Red China, there is also NO TRUTH — I repeat, no truth — to the rumors that the anal swabs will cause you to walk like a penguin, despite this video evidence:

And from Rumble:

In February of 2021, VICE reported that Red China gave several U.S. Dignitaries and Diplomats the invasive anal swabs by accident:

The Chinese government has promised to stop using anal swabs on American diplomats to test for COVID-19 after Washington complained that the practice was undignified, the U.S. State Department said.

“The State Department never agreed to this kind of testing and protested directly to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs when we learned that some staff were subject to it,” a State Department spokesperson told VICE World News on Wednesday.

The spokesperson said Beijing had assured Washington that the test was given “in error” and that diplomatic personnel were exempt from the test, which was mandatory for incoming travelers in some parts of China.

“We have instructed staff to decline this test if it is asked of them, as was done in the past.”

On Thursday afternoon, China’s foreign ministry spokesman Zhao Lijian denied Beijing had asked U.S. diplomats in China to undergo anal swab tests.

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Some Chinese regions have been ordering anal swabs for people under quarantine, including those who arrived from abroad. Authorities say the tests can avoid missing infections.

It’s not clear how many U.S. diplomats or their family members have gone through the tests.

The State Department spokesperson said it is committed to preserving the “dignity” of American diplomats and their families, consistent with the Vienna Convention on Diplomatic Relations and other diplomatic law provisions.

It is unclear if these are the official administration directions:


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