I think Bette Midler has a little too much time on her hands.
Because she just posted a very vile “Poem from Melania” and yes it’s as gross and disgusting as you might imagine:
And in case you can't read that, here you go:
A poem from Melania:
Each day I'm filled with the hope
That #Donald won't be such a Dope
So I get on my knees
And say vip it out plise
As I reach for my new microscope.
Bette, what is that, is that a Limerick?
Did you write a Limerick for Donald Trump?
Does it qualify as a Haiku?
Let's see, 5-7-5....? Nope, not a Haiku.
Can you write a Haiku for us tomorrow? You seem to have a lot of free time.
But what I REALLY enjoyed were the people who submitted Limericks back to Bette.
Some were genius, some were so bad they were hilarious, but all were classic!
Need to work on the pacing there Vinny, but bonus points for working in "wind beneath my wing". Nice work!
And then this from Aug1405:
Aug didn't really capture the essence of a Limerick, but personally the abrupt ending and finger point emoji sealed the deal for me, and this is in my Top 3 favorites.
Well done Auggie!
NCGiGi chimed in with this:
GiGi, the payoff is supposed to be in Line 5, so you gotta tighten it up a bit, but overall a very solid effort!
Then we have NavyCombatCorpsman with this submission:
I think Riddler/Midler is a better rhyme, so I like it right out of the gate.
I also like the complete disregard for proper formatting, just going right for the content!
And definitely one of my favorite punchlines at the end. Midler's career --> 💩
Richard put pen to paper with this gem:
Now I must have missed this, but I was not aware that Bette was acquainted with "Geraldo's Schlong".
Quality work "Richard".
See notes above on Line 5, tighten up your form.
This next submission from Snowstorm:
I like how he prefaces this with "A Poem for Butte Mudler", that's a nice touch!
Bonus points for hag, douchebag, and then tying it up with Butteugly!
Let me just end by saying clearly the "Deplorables" are the funniest and cleverest damn bastards out there!
You all make me very proud! 😁😁😁
If YOU would like to submit your own Limerick, please post below or email to me!