WARNING: another graphic article
Yes, this is yet another graphic article because we are yet again covering the disgusting things Beto O’Rourke said and did in his youth.
You’ve been warned.
Article begins now.
You know, I really hope Beto gets the Democrat nomination because President Trump would mop the floor with him.
Do you remember Trump reading “The Snake” poem in 2016 at his rallies?
It was always one of the best parts.
Well, let me tell you something….if Beto wins the nomination, President Trump will have a whole new poem to be reading in 2020.
And it’s a real doozy!
Written by a young Beto himself, it’s called The Song of the Cow, and while that sounds weird, it turns from weird to sick and perverted very quick.
I guess you could figure that out from the first line, which starts off with “I need a butt-shine”.
Yup, here’s the rest:
I need a butt-shine,
You are holy,
Oh, sacred Cow
I thirst for you,
Buff my balls,
Love the Cow,
Good fortune for those that do.
Love me, breathe my feet,
The Cow has risen.
Wax my ass,
Scrub my balls.
The Cow has risen,
Oh, Milky wonder, sing for us once more,
Live your life, everlusting joy.
Thrust your hooves up my analytic passage,
Enjoy my fruits
Provider of Cheese and other wonderful dairy products,
We will cleanse your inner intestines.
We will bathe in your Pungent Odor,
Count my eyes,
Smell my skin,
Love the Scarecrow and the Milkman.
I live only for eternity,
Thirst for the undrinkable.
Hold the heat,
Praise the dough boy at the pizza shop.
Love the Oxen dung!
Now, for those of you who are saying "this has to be fake", I'm afraid it sadly is not.
No, in fact, the entire poem has been preserved for all of time on the Internet's Wayback Machine, the site that archives all pages of the Internet and allows you to look back on them forever.
From the Wayback Machine, here it is in all it's "glory":
Now, here's my favorite part of the entire story....
Someone took the poem and turned it into this HILARIOUS video!